I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize