a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
...so i touched it.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize