So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
is this the sara with the beer cane?
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
