shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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