Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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