i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
