butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
