Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
dude i've broken up a marriage, I think I can handle a simple engagement.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
