Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
