Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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