LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
