Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
