help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
Randomize
