Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
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