what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
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