He passed out mid-signature
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Randomize