Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
