I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I just googled if crying burns calories
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
