no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
No don't worry! What are obnoxious, alcoholic, slut roommates for if not for uplifting words and tales of my folly?!
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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