Where is the hickey?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
