Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
