The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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