dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
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