I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
