dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
now i know why i became what i already was.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
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