He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
