Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Randomize
