Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
