White coat. Heels.
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
