i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
