it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
