So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
