You work out of a Hotel?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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