Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
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