hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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