I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
