Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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