Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize