Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
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