I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
