Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
did i just pee glitter
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
