Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
they call him Oral-B. enough said
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
