belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
