a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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