the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
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