Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
Randomize