yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
