talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Every concussion has its silver lining
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
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