Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I just gift wrapped bread.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
