Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
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